It's me. Half-Pint. I am runt of litter. But I am strong, fast and I love my mistress and her mate--the man with the beard who feeds us and gives good belly rubs. Makes me make a sound inside, I have no name for it. I only know I can't help but make that sound. It's different from when I call out "Meow" to get his attention.
Today we were busy hunting. Didn't catch nothing. But there were lots of flying things, things with funny tails that chattered at us. I am tired now. Want a huge nap. Might play a little. Teach my stupid older brother who is boss.
I love my mistress' fingers. They taste salty. Her toes have best flavor, but she covers them now. I don't understand that.
Also, my mistress is writer. She is busy, and I do not get to see her much. She didn't come out of their cave after dark, like her mate did. He gave me a good belly rub. I didn't want him to leave. He moved his face closer, so I gave him a kiss on the nose. I gave him three, in fact.
I think that my mistress has been busy putting up her short stories on a place called Amazon. I don't know Amazon. Is that a person, or an animal? I don't know. Anyway, she has been busy putting these up. One is called Holy Devil. That's a strange name for something, but I am only kitten who is three months old. She says its a version on someone named Rasputin, who is not really a holy man, but a vampire. And another one she calls, Vampire, My Own. I have no idea what a vampire is. She told me that story is for a younger crowd. Like me. I thought it was fun to listen to when she read it to me. I liked the girl in it. She was interesting. I wanted her to give me pettings.
She is working to put another one up called MURDER MANSION. Is something that sound scary. I ran and hid when I heard about this one. Is a scary ghost story. My review would be four kitten paws and one swish of the tail. It is scary, and dark and bloody. I am told it should be up on this thing called AMAZON soon. This coming week, in fact. It would be good if you go and buy them. They are not very much. Mast has bought a BIG bag of Meow Mix, now. You buy my mistress' books. It would help feed us wild cats. Think of it as a donation to us ferals. Pweeezzzz?
I think I am tired now. Going to curl up with the others. Mother has been acting strange lately. She whacked me one day when I tried to play with her. I went head over heals. Actually that was kind of fun. Hope you had fun chasing wild things like I did. Good night. Meow.